How do you feel about wearing a hat?

There are wide ones and small ones and some that are flat,

There are ones for the sun with a flap at the back,

And hard ones to save you from sudden impact,

There are hats for exploring the wild outback

With a sweatband inside and a handy chinstrap,

There are so many hats, and that is a fact -

But how do you feel about wearing a hat?

Fedoras and berets and hats made of straw,

Buckets and beanies, bowlers and more,

There are so many hats, and lots I adore,

But whichever I wear, the outcome is poor.

I am not a hat person, as simple as that -

When I put on a hat I do look like a prat.

Panama, helmet, sombrero, pork pie,

Hats that sit low and hats that rise high,

Earflaps and snapbacks, so many to try,

And I pick one and look and it’s ‘Oh my oh my!’

For I am not a hat person, and that’s where I’m at -

When I put on a hat I do look like a prat.

I did wear a sunhat one hot working day,

And my workmate looked once, then firmly did say,

‘You should not wear that hat, not that one, no way,

If we walk down the street, please stay 10 feet away.

You are not a hat person, no hat and that’s flat.

When you put on that hat you look a right prat.’

Bobble and cowboy, deerstalker, top,

Sunhats and ski-hats, the list does not stop,

There are so many hats that could cover my mop,

But every attempt that I make is a flop.

I am not a hat person, I’m certain of that -

If I put on a hat I do look like a prat.

So I rarely wear hats - thank goodness for hair,

And unless it is freezing, my head remains bare,

I feel hats don’t suit me – that seems so unfair!

But it’s not that important so I don’t really care.

Are you a hat person? Let us compare -

See a hat on a shelf and leave it right there?

Or do you put it on, with panache, style and flair?

I rarely wear hats, keep away from headwear,

When I wear a hat, I do look a prat.

I’m not a hat person -

As simple as that.